As a bit of fun on this hot summer’s Friday, an offering from Miller’s Maxims, my writings as self-appointed poet laureate to the Canadian bar.
The Law Does Not Concern Itself with Truffles
De minimis non curat lex (“The law does not concern itself with trifles” – an old legal maxim that never goes out of style, even if what we call trivial keeps getting bigger and nastier.)
*****Black truffles
If it’s true that the law ignores trifles,
Does that include all combat rifles,
Extant throughout the U.S.,
Where de blunderbuss non curat lex,
And the crusty old second amendment,
Is now a religious commandment?
No, the law won’t pursue those with riches,
Not even the worst sons of bitches
Who never pay their tax.
’Cause da middle class non curat lex.
(For one thing, they just can’t afford it,
For two things, the law don’t ignore that.)
The law don’t consume any truffles,
For the partnership hates office scuffles
Over billables lost on long lunches,
’Cause da lex, it non curat fungus,
And it doesn’t drink coffee or tea:
It’s Non-non! to bill time when we wee.
But the lex, it welcomes all troubles,
Your tumbles, your fumbles, your real estate bumbles
Your tussles and grumbles, your bar-room kerfuffles,
All sorrows that might plaintiffs vex,
’Cause da tsuris,* it curat da lex.
*Yiddish for “troubles.”
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